When Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade
Saturday, May 30, 2009 - Gene Bromberg
I never quite understood the saying I used as the title of my post–what else do you do with lemons aside from making lemonade? Squirt some on a piece of fish, use the juice to keep apples from browning…I dunno. Maybe I should take cooking lessons.
Know who got taught a lesson this afternoon? ESPN’s Norman Chad, who was schooled and ruled by Annie Duke in a little contest held outside the Amazon Room earlier today. The two squared off in a competition to see who could sell the most cups of lemonade to the thirsty masses crowding the Rio. With cameras and boom mikes swarming and curious interlopers pressing close, Annie and Norman chatted a bit before getting down to the serious business of cut-throat capitalism. First they had to make signs for their stands…
…and I think Annie won the artistic portion of the competion
And yes, you read that right–in addition to a refreshing glass of lemonade you’d also get a kiss from Annie. Already on the defensive Chad had to make up ground by developing a better product, but come now–who do you think is getting the most juice out of those lemons, Norm with his half-hearted one-handed technique or Annie with her double-fisted smush:
Desperate times call for desperate measures. First Chad went for simple character assassination:
But that didn’t work, as the first customer went right up to Annie, got her lemonade, and got a hug to boot:
People bee-lined to Annie, many of them with copies of this month’s Bluff magazine (with Annie on the cover) to be autographed. The situation spiraling out of control, Norm moved to childish defacement of Annie’s picture in hopes of swaying the crowd:
The crowd was decided unswayed, with Annie saying to Norm, “I’m running out of lemonade, can I have some of yours?” He was spared that humiliation when Annie’s pitchers were replenished, and a struggling Chad announced to the crowd that anyone who bought a glass from him would receive an autographed photo of Lon McEachern. Let’s just say the masses were unmoved. And that’s when the desperate Chad had a moment of inspiration:
Norman lassoed the Milwaukee’s Best Light girls, and for a moment I thought this masterstroke would turn the tide. Especially as the next customer in line was WSOP Commissioner Jeffrey Pollack–a sale to the World Series’ head honcho would at the very least help Chad save some face. But after shaking hands with Norm and his lovely assistants, Pollack said that he’d be taking his business three feet to his right. Which made someone very happy:
Norman accepted Pollack’s decision with a quiet dignity. Well, no, that’s a total lie–I think the expression of Chad’s face could be used in the dictionary as the definition of “sneer”:
In the end Annie raised $327 for her charity, Refugees International. A modest sum, but hopefully the ESPN segment showing Annie squeezing the life out of Norm will bring Refugees International to the attention of even more people. And now if you’ll excuse me, I’m suddenly very thirsty. Lemonade…that sounds good…
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Tags: 2009 world series of poker, 2009 wsop, Annie Duke, annie duke espn lemonade, annie duke lemonade, annie duke vs norman chad, jeffrey pollack, norman chad, refugees international, world series of poker, world series of poker lemonade, WSOP, wsop lemonade
May 30th, 2009 at 8:16 pm
[...] after trouncing Norman Chad in this afternoon’s lemonade-stand competition, Annie Duke returned to her day job and has built up a 45,000 stack. Annie’s WSOP bracelet [...]
May 31st, 2009 at 3:45 am
Now THIS Is SoCooL … Officially .. Unequivocally …