The Grand Production
Sunday, August 2, 2009 - Gene Bromberg
For most of the players in this year’s Main Event physically getting there was NOT half the fun. Getting to the Rio itself is no big deal, but then the blistering sun punishes you while walking across the parking lot, and then you have to deal with the anxious crowds in the halls. But for most the real journey doesn’t begin until security throws open the Amazon Room doors and let’s everyone inside.
Of course Phil Hellmuth doesn’t run with the pack. Once again this year he made a grand entrance into the Main Event, and this year he (and everyone else responsible for pulling this off) went far beyond anything we’ve seen before. Phil was borne to the front of the Rio in a sedan chair, and then escorted by 11 Gladiators and 100 Muses to his seat at the feature table. Well, rather than describe it why not just show what it looked like:
As we all waited in the broiling sun for Phil to appear I found myself looking at the ladies dressed as “gladiators” and found myself wondering “How the heck did they do that?” And by that I mean the extensive body-paint that each gladiator was wearing. The straps on the shoulders and the UB logos on their backs–they’re painted on. Speaking as someone with zero artistic ability my mind tried (and failed) to figure out how they did it. Each model looked identical, and I knew they had to paint them all that morning. How’d they pull it off?
Well, wonder no more, as there’s a behind-the-scenes video of the models being prepared before Phil’s grand entrance (and video of his arrival as well). Kinda neat to see it all from begining to end…still can’t believe that a lot of the decorations were painted freehand. I couldn’t have managed that in a million years. Anyway, enjoy:
Entering the Amazon Room dressed as Caesar, with 111 young women in tow. How, exactly, do you top that for 2010? Do you even try? Or do you go for something totally different. Some of my fellow wags on media row discussed what Phil might try next year for his entrance, here’s a few of the ideas that were bandied about:
- A jet-pack. This was actually the most frequently-raised option, that Phil might streak down the Strip in a Space-Age jet pack before banking left and soaring over I-15 to the Rio. Or, maybe, even swooping through the open doors and streaking down the hallway, hovering over the Feature Table before gently alighting upon his seat. Now THAT would be an entrance, though with a jet-pack there would be the very real possibily of a hilarious tragic accident. Phil bonking into a palm tree or knocking over a gaggle of fans like so many duckpins would not be an auspicious start to the Main Event.
- Sky-dive into the Main Event. Phil jumps out of an airplane with, say, 11 (or more, depending how the 2010 Series goes) precision jumpers. Black-and-gold smoke billowing from his boots, Phil would gently touch down at the Rio and, still at a trot, detach himself from his chute and race to his seat still dressed in his custom-made jump gear. The problem with this idea is that landing at a precise location ain’t that easy, and what with all the power lines criss-crossing Vegas a near-miss could be a real problem. Also the searing Vegas sun baking the asphalt probably creates some wicked thermals, and I can just see Phil floating above the Rio, borne aloft by powerful updrafts, carried by the breeze until he’s finally able to touch down in coyote/tumbleweed country. Which could lead to hilarious uncomfortable circumstances.
- Phil the Ninja. Instead of a Hollywood production leading to his Main Event arrival, Phil infiltrates the tournament by stealth. Dressed head-to-toe in black Neoprene and suspended from the Amazon Room rafters hours before play begins, Phil suddenly appears out of nowhere, throwing a handful of flash-powder on the table and descending Mission Impossible style via a filament-thin zipline. Once in his seat he pulls out a razor-sharp katana and cuts the deck in two with a glittering blade. THIS idea I like, it reinvents the whole big entrance idea and inspires a different sort of awe. It would add an aura of mystery, as everyone knows Phil ALWAYS makes a big entrance and, yet, no one seems have a clue what it might be. And no one manages to figure it out before…they’re dead. Figuratively speaking, of course.
So these are just a few ideas, please feel free to contribute your own in the comments. Now’s the time to brainstorm, because there’s only about 49 weeks until the 2010 Main Event kicks off.
Tags: 2009 main event, 2009 world series of poker, 2009 wsop, Phil Hellmuth, phil hellmuth caesar, phil hellmuth entrance, phil hellmuth main event, phil hellmuth main event entrance, world series of poker, WSOP
